Can you describe your journey that led you to Stoicism?

Can I do so without being long-winded, that’s the question! In 2003 I had become a member of a Neo-Roman forum called the Societas Via Romana and was introduced there to Stoic thought and philosophy. Years later, in 2006, I had a bit of a mid-life crisis (depression, suicidal thought, etc.). I picked up Sandbach’s “The Stoics” when searching for something on the order of self-help for my depression; I was trying to get a grip on living in the midst of a world that was, to me, entirely violent, mad, chaotic, and fruitless. Nature and culture, what for others translate to opportunity and liveliness, was for me failure and absurdity. It seemed, in all particulars, a betrayal and a nightmare. But I read Sandbach’s book as well as others, and I benefited from some CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy). The biggest shot-in-the-arm, however, was taking the College of Stoic Philosophers SES course (Stoic Essentials Studies). So I began to understand to get a better perspective - one that was not primarily emotional and self-involved.

How has Stoic thinking changed your definition of success and happiness?

The biggest change as far as “Success” goes came from the CBT-type therapy that I got, and also from group therapy, where I found that I was not alone in being depressed and alienated. As to “Happiness”: Happiness for most of us is normally defined as feel-good-all-the-time-ism. But it became for me a word with two very different meanings: (1) the common notion (an emotional response correlated with prestige, gratification, wealth, talent, ego, satiation, inebriation, etc.); and (2) the ancient philosophical notion, that more solid happiness was eudaimonia, “well-hearted-ness” (or “serenity” or “thriving” or however we try to translate it). It was the second notion that held out hope to me: I began to appreciate “desiring what you have” instead of “having what you desire”.

What defines your meaning and purpose on a daily basis?

Largely my family, wife and children. Beyond that, trying to understand life and people (as opposed to simply being outraged and blaming people).

Do you have a daily Stoic routine, and what is the most important part of that routine?

I do not have a specific daily Stoic routine; however, I am routinely applying the Rule - evaluating whether what affects me (or what I disapprove of) is up to me, or not up to me. I also carry Marcus Aurelius with me daily, in case I have time to read. I am not a focused, disciplined, achievement-oriented person; left to myself, I’m prey to appetites and distractions, so I try to maintain both the stress of reflection and being useful, and the satisfaction of having done both. Knowing what you know now, what would you go back and tell your younger self? That Stoicism is as close to a key for solving the problem of life as one will ever find; that there is no simple Key to happiness. The above-mentioned maxim - try to want what you do have, instead of trying to have what others have or what they falsely value. That anyone who claims to have THE TRUTH is fooling him or her self and doing violence to Reason and Truth and, ultimately, the Human Race. That God (however you envision that) has set you a duty to live, with whatever meager and imperfect resources you have, and that suicide is most often foolish and cowardly.

Besides Stoicism, what other wisdom / philosophy / spiritual practice do you fall back on?

I embrace a certain amount of what Christianity has learned over the centuries, although I utterly disagree with its claim that it alone is The Truth. I respect the proper sort of hedonism that was practiced by Epicurus. I respect Buddhism as being very near to Stoicism in its approach to life. What is your biggest struggle when it comes to practicing Stoicism? Self-discipline (I have addictive issues). Stepping back when I’m angry and insulted, and regaining my proper perspective. I am, in fact, a pretty shoddy Stoic.

Who is your favorite philosopher and why?

Marcus Aurelius, I guess; he deals with the cosmic contradictions on one hand, and the duties of an intelligent person on the other. But then there is Epictetus, and Seneca. And I have an inveterate respect for Albert Camus.

Being a Stoa leader, do you seek to promote your group actively or is it organic?

The “leadership” position for our stoa (the Redwood Stoa) has always been shared. I don’t do advertising beyond monthly reminders and occasional announcements. In fact, I rather disapprove of making a commercial venture out of something that is supposed to be philosophical and a matter of Reason.

Can you describe what you do at a typical Stoic group meeting that you lead?

We have a format that we chose rather early in its formation (2013): We have a yearly set of monthly Stoic themes or topics for discussion - certain tenets, virtues, etc. Each meeting begins with a few introductions, ground rules and resources. Then we discuss the topic to be addressed, not from a scholarly point of view, but from both our readings and our own understandings and experiences. We have a round-the-group discussion of how you have demonstrated Stoic behavior (or, sometimes, how you have failed to do so). We end with “business” - news of upcoming events or suggestions for changes in the meeting format. And finally, goodbyes. What else do you want others to know about you? About me? As I put it on Meetup, I’m - “An un-stoical Stoic: I'm older, spent my youth depressed, but the benefit of Stoicism is largely perspective, how to regard life.”

Congratulations on your 10 year anniversary, what wisdom can you share on running a stoa for 10 years?

It’s not just me, and we have no special tricks. We’ve been lucky in that people find the group hospitable rather than elitist or competitive, and the core members keep coming back.

Where can people find out more about you and your Stoic group?

It’s on Meetup.com via this link: (https://www.meetup.com/the-redwood-stoa/) We meet once a month. And our monthly minutes are to be found at this site: https://redwoodstoa.wordpress.com